fun. crazy. life.

As you may have noticed, this week has kicked my butt. Despite sick kiddos, I did get a lot of things done.

• Like finally submitting receipts to our flex-spending-medical-account-thing… for the first time since last JUNE. 
• Like cleaning the house like crazy, because looking at the mess was making my eye twitch. (But - my ipod is working again! Its a MIRACLE! So I’ve been cleaning while shaking my bon-bon and counting it as exercise. Multitasking!)
• Like paying bills. Again. (Wasn’t it just the end of the month a few days ago? How is it that time again? Good news is I paid everything this month. Unlike last month, when I forgot to pay the Mastercard. Um, whoops. Luckily, the customer service lady was also a new mom and very understanding.)
• Like doing some planning for the reopening of Eliza Grace (Which I am so excited for. Let me just tell you. Four words: New. Spring. Fabric. Collections. Be still my heart.) AND the launch of another business I’m heading up. You know, in my spare time.

Anyways… I’m taking the weekend off of everything, getting some extra rest and hopefully will be back in full swing on Monday, gearing up for the last two weeks of school and the thousands of extra activities that entails. Ellie has like 3 graduation ceremonies. Seriously? Its only preschool, people!! She’s not winning the Nobel Prize or something!

See what happens? I say I’m done blogging and then I suddenly have stuff to say. I’m done… now.
No, now.
I mean it…..

Now.

• For that first morning feeding, you realize you are nursing the baby at your desk, while drinking coffee, eating breakfast, e-mailing and putting on your make-up while your other kids are watching tv nearby. Loudly. You are not sitting in a rocking chair in a softly lit, quiet room with no distractions.
• Your baby takes 3 of 5 naps in his car seat. Instead of you staying at home, refusing to disturb your little bundle’s naptime.
• You let your husband travel just 2 weeks after baby is born. Telling him, “I’m going to be tired anyway…” As opposed to freaking out when he is 10 minutes late coming home from work, because how will you cook dinner with a baby?
• You hear yourself say to your other kid “Yuck! Go wipe your nose and stop using the baby as a tissue!!” Instead of keeping him completely isolated from germs and going through a gallon of Purell a week.
• You are surviving on massive amounts of caffeine. Instead of still being on decaf, because you gave up coffee the minute you found out you were pregnant. (Snort! Novice.)
• You don’t rush to your baby’s side at the slightest noise. Instead you lay in bed arguing with your spouse over whose turn it is to go get him. As he screams his head off. (The baby. Not your spouse.)
• Because the baby is sleeping in his own room already. Instead of in a cradle, an arm’s length from your bed until he is 6 months old.

On the other hand, despite the craziness and the not sleeping, I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world. Because I’m not sure there is anything that could possibly be any sweeter than overhearing your older children sing “Baby Mine” to their baby brother. Just thinking about it makes my heart squeeze and tears come to my eyes.

Reading to Baby Colin

Its Star Wars. Seriously. It goes back to childhood, watching these movies over and over and over with my brother. Flying in spaceships and fighting with light sabers.

So fun.

Anyway, if you also are a closet fan or even if you’ve just seen it at some point in your life, you must watch  this awesome “low-budget Star Wars” video. It is extremely impressive, not to mention hilarious!!! I find the soundtrack to be particularly funny.

I see so much of myself in you. Not just because you look almost exactly like my childhood photos. But so many things you do - even in things I don’t remember teaching you. The way you love pink and all things girly. The way you sort your M&Ms at eat only one color at a time. The way you love jewelry and try to convince me to let you wear mine. The way you hate to wear shoes. The way you hate having anything done to your hair. The way you love to help me cook and bake. The way you adore your daddy. Even the way you love the beach.

I love how sweet you are. How you thank me for vacuuming your bedroom or washing your clothes. The way you come up to me and give me a hug around the leg and a kiss. They way you try to cheer me up by being silly when you see I’m upset about something. The way you play with my hair while telling me I’m pretty. The way you love to crawl into bed and snuggle up to my side. Then you pat my face and whisper “I love you.” I love taking you out for coffee and listening to you tell me about what’s on your mind. I love listening to you sing. I love listening to you pray.

You are such a sweet big sister to Gracie. And I love how excited you are for your baby brother to arrive. The way you talk about all the things you want to teach him and places you want to take him. The way you say, “I just can’t wait to hold him and give him a big kiss.” You are going to be so wonderful to him and I cannot wait to watch you see him for the first time.

As much as I am happy for you to be five and as much as I love watching you grow up, it makes me a little sad. Because the chubby-cheeked baby is gone and this remarkably tall little girl has replaced her. Because this year will mark your starting school, getting on that big school bus all by yourself as I stand on the sidewalk watching it carry you to a world I can only be a small part of. Because I know the struggles of growing up that you must face, that I can’t protect you from.

We’ve come a long way from this:

I’m so thankful to be your mama. And I can’t even begin to imagine what this next year will bring. I’m excited to see all the new thing you learn this year, excited to see you grow. I’m excited to keep seeing you grow into your own little person. And I can’t wait to see you react to all this next year is going to bring.

since I can’t seem to focus my brain on any one thing today…
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Well, I’m now in my third trimester!! Can you believe how fast this is going? Because I can’t. Doctor says everything is going great - just keep up the resting when I need it. I’ve gained 20 pounds so far. Of course, for me, the 3rd trimester is when the weight really  sneaks up on me…
Speaking of that, I would like you all to know that I have had a bag of Chex Mix in my house for an entire 24 hours and there is still half of it left. This is a major exercise in restraint for me, you understand. And it will probably be gone by tonight
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Why does rain in the winter make it feel so much colder than snow? I am freeeeezzzzing this morning. Snow makes me feel all snug and cozy in my warm little house. Rain makes me feel… blah. Plus, I’ve had just about enough water this week, thankyouverymuch.
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Last night we had people Husband works with over for the first time. I was totally not nervous. (That is a lie. I was freaking out!) I’ve met most of the people he works with, but these particular people and I certainly haven’t met them in our home with our potentially embarrassing children.  What should I cook? And - much more importantly - what should I wear? I wanted to make a good impression, but I also wanted to appear casual like I wasn’t actually trying to impress anyone. You know what I mean?
I cleaned like a madwoman and cooked all afternoon. It actually went very well, except for Ellie acting like a total dork (which she tends to do when there are strange adults around). Now I can move on with my life.
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Okay - one thing I do love about a cold, rainy, yucky day is drinking piping hot coffee out of my favorite mug while wearing a warm sweater and fuzzy socks. See? I can see the bright side!
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I’ve decided I’m not reading cnn.com anymore. It just ends up making me depressed and disgusted with humanity. After ignoring anything to do with the elections (”Clinton and Obama are fighting! Again!” or “McCain says something!”) What stories to I always end up clicking on?  Bombings here, genocide there…. not to mention all the freaky articles. Seriously, how could you not click on an article titled “Mom put baby in microwave“? So I think I need to just stop going there, since its probably not helping me have a positive outlook on life….
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I am really looking forward to this weekend. Dinner with some of my favorite people tonight, Husband isn’t working all weekend, relaxing tomorrow (Perhaps a bit of sleeping in? Or a nap? Or both?)… Not to mention the yearly challenge of finding something interesting to do on Superbowl Sunday. Who is playing again?